What I learned in 2021

Well it has been a hot minute since I’ve been on here. Life has been a bit of a whirlwind. So much so that for the first time in months (years?) I am actually perfectly content vegging out on the couch all day long. Usually I get really antsy an hour or two in, but…More

In-between thoughts: dangerous ideas

Thoughts between sets at the gym. I am about a third of the way through this workout and every single muscle in my upper body is quivering. I somehow gritted out 9 pullups my first set then barely did 5 each following set. I went up in weight on the upright chest press and now…More

Marking seasons in a relatively seasonless Hawai’i

Is it autumn? It doesn’t feel like autumn. I know I’ve already complained about it, but seriously. It is not anything one would recognize as autumnal around these parts. The trees are still green as ever, the temperatures have not discernibly dipped, and even though pumpkins are EVERYWHERE, it feels a little like I’m violating…More

My heart is yearning for seasonal change

I miss the feeling of change. I miss slow-motion kaleidoscope landscapes. I miss visible transformation that reassures me the way of things is to transform, to change. I miss returnings. Returning to winter coats, returning to sundresses. Returning to coziness, returning to lazy, sun-drenched beaches, returning to cool, brisk jogs. The familiar that becomes new…More

In-between thoughts: trusting myself

Thoughts in-between sets at the gym. OH MY GOSH WHY DID I TAKE A MONTH OFF FROM LIFTING. That was so dumb. So, so dumb. I am markedly weaker. But I guess this gives me a goal (my former strength waahh) so I’ll embrace it. Also, only one of my Bluetooth ear buds is working.…More

SEP, what do you want from me

Ready for a pointless mental wandering that probably interests only me? I PROVIDE. My husband studies SEPs: Solar Energetic Particles. One of my go-to study tools is the SEP: the Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy. Do the letters S, E, and P exhibit some kind of magnetic or guiding power over my life? If I had…More

In-between thoughts: WHY DID NONE OF YOU TELL ME ABOUT BUTTERMILK

Thoughts between sets at the gym. It’s starting to be a theme. A couple weeks off from the gym, one or two sessions, then a couple weeks off. What can I say, I take rest and recovery VERY VERY seriously. But I’m here, I’m lifting, and I’m looking forward to being VERY VERY sore the…More

Our bodies tell us what it’s like to be ourselves

There are so many little ways I inhabit and experience my body. Which is just another way of saying there are so many little sensory experiences that add up to “what it feels like to be me”. Typing right now, my thumb nail is digging slightly into the skin around it, making a strange scratching…More

The wonder of being witness

I was listening to contemporary Hawaiian music on our TV the other day, and the album cover of the track playing showed a Native Hawaiian man, with tribal tattoos and half-tied-back black, wavy hair, standing on a beach smiling at someone off-camera. I was filled with a sense of awe for the remoteness and richness…More

Recipe: Spiced Cherry Muffins (and they’re vegan!)

I bought a can of OREGON Dark Sweet Cherries a few week ago, intending to make my favorite Chocolate Cherry Loaf from the steely-eyed Paul Hollywood. (It is seriously so, so good.) However, when later in the week Chris told me that chocolate hasn’t been sitting well with his stomach lately, I decided to switch…More