Deserving honesty

Honesty is a huge bug-a-bear for me. (Is that the expression? Whatever. If it wasn't before, it is now.) I struggle with honesty, for several reasons. I don't want to make people feel bad. I don't like being wrong. I'm often wrong and people are harsh and judgmental about those who are wrong. I don't … Continue reading Deserving honesty

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In defense of shame

I hold a rather controversial opinion. I think shame is good. Seriously. I like shame. I mean, I don't enjoy -like shame, but I appreciate-like shame. I like what it does when working rightly. And I believe it can work rightly. This is not a popular opinion. Shame is mostly seen as a negative emotion, … Continue reading In defense of shame

Happiness and the meaningful life, and how Hawaii both helps and hurts (new-ish AOV episode)

Diane and I recorded a new podcast episode exploring the relationship between happiness and pleasure. I really like how Martin Seligman, one of the creators of the field of positive psychology, characterizes happiness: an overall state, the arc of a life that includes more positively-valenced feelings than negatively-valenced feelings. AOV Episode 24: Happiness/Pleasure The three … Continue reading Happiness and the meaningful life, and how Hawaii both helps and hurts (new-ish AOV episode)

In-Between Thoughts 2.13.19 — strengthening others against shame

Lifting update: I'm still seeing improvements and am consistently getting my strength back, a little at a time. Slow and steady works! Aaaaaand onto thoughts... On Tuesday Diane and I published a podcast episode on shame/guilt, and it was such a satisfying one to record because I struggle so much with shame. As such, I … Continue reading In-Between Thoughts 2.13.19 — strengthening others against shame